Paradoxes

All energy in this miraculous life is generated by the dynamic interplay of opposites-anions and cations, positive and negative magnetic charges, antimatter and matter, black holes and universes, darkness and light. Nature is self-similar, therefore we can suppose that opposites also enliven our lives emotionally and spiritually . When we understand the dynamics of opposites or paradoxes in our lives, then these seemingly frustrating and often mysterious occurrences can give meaning and power to who we are.

                The positive and negative aspects of our lives: events, people and situations are difficulties which we all cope with every day. Positive influences can be identified as having a felt sense of light, joy, compassion, right action and a holistic view. Positive aspects carry us forward and give spiritual direction for the future. The negative forces in our lives are characterised by an absence of light, they often arise from past conditioning which no longer serves us. They surface from fear, jealousy, control, suffering or arrogance. Negative aspects do not have a view of the future, they are the stickiness of a fear reaction that does not see beyond the immediate needs of the situation. Negative aspects bind us to short term rigid judgements that exclude any possibility of progress or evolution. They often appear as black and white thinking and are logically inconsistent.

                This is my description of positive and negative aspects. You will have your own. Each person has both aspects within themselves and in their daily experiences.  I suggest at the end of this article, you take some time to investigate and identify opposites within your life. E.g. George, he’s a great friend, he’s fun to be with and we have history together. But he’s also sarcastic and denigrating; over time we’ve grown so far apart that I sometimes find his company irritating. I love him but I also hate him.

                The really interesting thing about dealing with opposites is that we have to recognize both sides of the conflict. We can’t ignore , resist or try to overcome either side of any conflict-inwardly or outwardly. First we have to acknowledge each side and listen to the needs of each side of the paradox. By working in this way, we can take what is negative in our lives-unhealthy relationships, stressful situations, physical pain, addictions, depression, anxiety-and begin to work with them in a alchemistic  manner that turns negative into positive- lead into gold.

                We can turn to mythology for some wisdom about how to cope with paradoxes in a healthy way. Freud described mythology as “the latent content of a neurosis [is] registered in the manifest content of a dream: registered yet hidden, registered in the unconscious yet unknown or misconstrued by the conscious mind."[1] The myth of Perseus and Medusa may offer a ‘registered yet hidden’  way to  deal with paradoxes.  Medusa (translated as Guardian or Protectress from the Greek) had the power to turn anyone who gazed directly at her into stone. Perseus was sent out to destroy her. However, he was warned that he could not look directly at her for fear of turning into stone. We can understand this symbolism as his inability to see directly into the shadow side of his own life. He had to use a reflection to see Medusa and slay her.  So he held up his shield to catch her reflection and in  this way he beheaded the shadow side of his nature. Then he gave her head to the greater goddess, Athena. Her blood , the myth relates, had powerful qualities, it could either give or take away life. The myth goes on to pronounce that any shield with the image of Medusa would be protective.

                This is also true about the shadow side of ourselves. If we try to oppose negativity directly , we will become the negative itself. We turn into stone. By opposing the negative directly, we take on its characteristics. Because by turning our attention towards the negative, we give it energy, we invite it further into our lives. So , like Perseus, we must see the negative through a reflection-in the environment.  And then we can resolve it, not by direct confrontation and resistance , but by applying the opposite, by utilizing the positive aspects of understanding, love, compassion and clear vision. Just as Medusa’s blood could either take away life or heal, the way we cope with the paradoxes in our lives is either transformative or destructive.

                World Metaphoric Transformation shows a way to work with paradoxes in a skillful manner. First, we must recognize these aspects in a realistic and honest way. Perseus had to see where Medusa was to overcome her negative influence. In the same way, we must clearly see both sides, even if we cannot oppose the negative directly. We must look and work within reflections from the outside world. This way we circumvent the defensive mechanisms of the ego by looking outside ourselves and take guidance there. In World Metaphoric Transformation the outside world is our shield and mirror. In this mirror we can see both a clear reflection of our negative aspects as well as the path to transform the paradox. Taking this approach is enough to resolve the most obdurate neurosis and psychological problems.

                When the opposites are identified, and both their voices are heard, then we can create a third aspect which is a resolution of both and neither of these. The third is the resolution or the Other. It is an energetic jump up from the dynamics and paradigm of the two opposites. When the opposites are held both together and inside as one, then we can glimpse the solution-the Other. In the darkness of our struggles we can glimpses the light of soul; in the light of soul, we can see the dark stars of learning and growth.

Try This!

1.            Bring to mind one difficult or area of development that you are presently working with. This could be a work challenge, a relationship, or a life direction. Hold a sense of this difficulty deeply within your awareness by closing your eyes and sinking into a body felt sense of the conflict.

2.            Now identify the other side of this conflict. There are always two opposing sides of any conflict-these are the elements of the paradox that you are struggling to resolve. E.g. I want to be a good mother but I also need to look after myself right now. I’m injured from a collision and I need some time to heal. But my children need me and I’m missing out in important life stages with them because I’m always tired and confused because of my injuries.

3.            Open your eyes and look around you. If you can, go for a short walk outside. Just be open to what the world presents as a message and guidance around this paradox. E.g. I looked around and saw a Buddha statue behind a gauzy white curtain. The wind was blowing the curtain back and forth so at times the statue  almost disappeared, but then it reappeared again as the wind diminished.

4.            Follow the message back to soul. E.g. This message is telling me that at times it will look as if  I am moving away from what I want-to be a good mother. But then other circumstances (the wind) blow differently and it appears as if I am moving closer. However, the statue (my enlighten heart) is always there and remains constant. Just the same way, the statue stays stationary, it is the curtain (my own circumstances) that moves, not my heart.

5.            Now by holding both sides of the paradox, and using the message from the world in a soul way, resolve the opposites. E.g. I will have to back off from caring for my children right now until I am healthy. But like the statue behind the curtain, my love for them remains and in some way, they will be able to understand and accept that. This will not harm them, in fact it could beneficial for them to see how someone cares for themselves in a loving, healing way after a traumatic event.

6.            Bring the message back to your everyday life and create an action commitment. E.g. Today I’m going to email my insurance company and ask for 6 hours a week of respite from my children so I can attend yoga classes and go swimming. I also see that the difficulty of this experience has taught me how to be more assertive about my own needs and to resolve some deep guilt I’ve had about the accident.

(1)          Campbell, Joseph (1968). The Masks of God, Vol. 3: Occidental Mythology. Penguin Books. pp. 152–153. ISBN 978-0140194418.

Medusa image downloaded from "Medusa by Caravaggio" by Caravaggio - http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/caravaggio/medusa.jpg. Licensed under Public Domain via Wikimedia Commons - https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Medusa_by_Carvaggio.jpg#/media/File:Medusa_by_Carvaggio.jpg